[ it's even more frustrating that he gets mad at her for getting mad at him for almost endangering their lives. but they're not doing this again, she's not going to bite back. she knows she's getting mad over something stupid just because she's afraid to act like she doesn't completely hate him for more than five minutes. it's hard, this strange process of starting to rekindle whatever relationship they had. she huffs and tries to figure out how to apologize without really apologizing. ]
I know. I just... [ she swallows whatever else she was about to say, whatever words of apology were about to come out of her mouth, and makes a grumbling noise instead. ] Whatever.
[ the fact that she's still following him should be more than enough to prove that something has changed, that she's being defensive of things entirely unrelated to the past as a whole and entirely related to the past five minutes.
she hates how much she wants to reach out and grab his hand again, just to feel his fingers against hers. she hates that she can't just say i'm sorry. it's not that easy. sometimes she's not even entirely sure she knows how to apologize — or forgive. nothing about war is about forgiveness or saying you're sorry, it's about making sure people remember. it's about proving a point. it's about dominance and fighting for what you believe in.
but war comes at a cost, and it comes with scars. luke's lived with a scar all his life — maybe even his whole life was the a scar; clarisse is only just now learning how to heal. and maybe she's learning how to forgive, too. ]
no subject
I know. I just... [ she swallows whatever else she was about to say, whatever words of apology were about to come out of her mouth, and makes a grumbling noise instead. ] Whatever.
[ the fact that she's still following him should be more than enough to prove that something has changed, that she's being defensive of things entirely unrelated to the past as a whole and entirely related to the past five minutes.
she hates how much she wants to reach out and grab his hand again, just to feel his fingers against hers. she hates that she can't just say i'm sorry. it's not that easy. sometimes she's not even entirely sure she knows how to apologize — or forgive. nothing about war is about forgiveness or saying you're sorry, it's about making sure people remember. it's about proving a point. it's about dominance and fighting for what you believe in.
but war comes at a cost, and it comes with scars. luke's lived with a scar all his life — maybe even his whole life was the a scar; clarisse is only just now learning how to heal. and maybe she's learning how to forgive, too. ]